The questions are divided into six categories: Asking and answering these questions can help couples feel closer, learn about each other, and reminisce or dream for the future together. I am looking forward to the quality time and the connection that will result from implementing these ideas. Thank you so much. 6 connection exercises for couples to build intimacy. God bless. Not only does it provide an overview of Emotion-Focused Therapy (EFT), it also provides simple strategies, useful tips and tools, and interesting case studies to help you get the basics in this type of therapy. The old faithful activity for bringing people together – icebreakers! Hi Manvitha, What do you think is most important in a good romantic relationship? Click to see this Good Qualities worksheet and print it out for yourself or your clients. This exercise provides you and your partner with an opportunity to interact as adults (no kids allowed) and without distractions (no phones, tablets, or laptops allowed). Taxation (VAT) Number: NL855806813B01, PositivePsychology.com This piece included a description of couples counseling or couples therapy and introduced several engaging, informative, and helpful exercises for making the most out of a romantic relationship. Until we can find that 100% success guaranteed recipe for a perfect relationship, we’ll have to make do with what we do have – building our relationship skills, communicating effectively, engaging in activities that enhance our connection, and using couples therapy to tackle any of the big issues. One of the best ways to help you maintain a healthy and happy relationship is to invest time and energy in it. There are no disadvantages to feel connected with your partner, so go for it! My boyfriend of 6 years off and on are going thru some hard times because of something stupid i did 2 years ago while we were seperated for almost a year. Relationship Expectations Worksheet So many misunderstandings in our relationships can come from assumed unstated expectations. Having realistic expectations in our relationships involves accepting that no one is perfect, accepting ourselves and our partners for who we are and what we can contribute to the relationship. Move so close to one another that your knees are nearly touching, and look into each other’s eyes. Couples Therapy outlines Ripley and Worthington, Jr.’s approach, expands on the theory behind it (note: approach also has a foundation in Christian beliefs), and provides assessment tools, real-life case studies, and resources for use in counseling. Mutual expectations are a vital part of human relationships. Simply look into one another’s eyes, even if it’s awkward at first. Expectations are referred to only fleetingly in The Compatibility Code; however, few issues sound the death knell of a marriage more certainly than unfulfilled expectations. God bless. What is your greatest concern about our family, and have you felt free to express it to me? The questions listed here focus on maximizing your marriage and are excerpted (with permission) from Beneath the Surface by Bob Reccord, a book designed to guide you in guarding your heart and steering clear of the dangers that could leave you, and your family, shipwrecked. If you or your client are struggling in a romantic relationship, this is another good worksheet to try. Am I treating you as the most important person on earth to me? For example, you could ask your partner questions like: This simple game can get you and your partner sharing intimate and meaningful details with one another, improving your connection and building up your relationship base. © 2020 Focus on the Family (Canada) Association. ... All of the above mentioned can help to learn what your partner is expecting, your expectations, how to handle important issues, if you are compatible or if the marriage is not ideal. Set a timer for this exercise (three to five minutes will usually do the trick) and let your partner talk. But it can also be stressful, if you're putting too much pressure on the partnership. What if I told you there was a magic recipe for making a relationship work? Between Sessions offers therapy resources for clients experiencing relationship issues. If not, what can I do to improve that? You can find this highly reviewed “for Dummies” book on Amazon. Much appreciated, Thank you for the very informative and helpful article in couples therapy. While we offer marriage therapy resources and couples therapy worksheets, relationship issues aren’t exclusive to the institution of marriage. Is Your Relationship Affected by Your Deep Seated Fears? Wahoo! How can I help you best succeed at your work as you provide for the needs of our family? There is no one “best” activity that couples can engage in to build a healthy relationship and fend off divorce or separation because each couple will have their own best practice. Even if you think you know everything there is to know about your partner, asking them some fun icebreaker questions is bound to produce at least one or two new facts about your partner that you didn’t know before. Thank you. If there was a totally effective method for happy, healthy relationships out there, surely someone would have packaged it up and sold it by now, right? When the timer goes off, switch roles and try the exercise again. u dot feel the doing it for selling u Download 3 Positive Psychology Tools (PDF). Bonior, A. To read more about these steps, you can view or download the Apologizing Effectively worksheet from our Toolkit. We are both wondering if there is a way back ( from all the fights and bad words said ) ? Your personal information is always safe with us. Hi, Are we sometimes allowing our children to play one of us against the other, and if so, what adjustments do we need to make to avoid that? Absolutely fantastic. (Suval, 2015). Thank you very much i just hope that my partner agrees to this quests, Hope to see more! As a teacher in church and a student in marriage and family therapy it will give me some mileage . The chemicals that are released when we cuddle with our partner improve our mood, deepen our connection, and can even help us sleep better. He says hes forgiven me but throws it in my face every chance he gets and in front of people. Appreciate your sincere effort in sharing knowledge with the world around. However, you decide to do it, be creative and don’t be afraid to get silly with your partner! To try this exercise, face your partner in a seated position. As an example, you could ask your partner, “What are five things that you love that I have done for you lately?”, Their answers might be something like, “Taking out the trash, making a dinner reservation, getting my car detailed, cuddling with me, and watching my favorite movie with me.”, Once they finish their list, come up with your own answer to the question, such as, “Fixing the water heater, pulling weeds, sewing the button back on my shirt, telling me how much you love me, and kissing me goodnight each night.”. Am I doing enough to make you feel adequate in our relationship and assuring you that I see you that way? It is written specifically for couples who are highly reactive, or quick to argue, quick to anger, and quick to blame; however, any couple will find useful information in this book. I met a prophetess who was restoring love back to how it was, and so i made contact and explained what i was going through to him, she asked me to wait for two weeks time and everything will be solved, i did what was asked of me and waited. It might be difficult at first, but you will get the hang of it before long. Positive exercises are a huge part of my life but not “our” life. You could have one partner go first and list all five things, or you and your partner could alternate saying one of your five things at a time. II will be happy to receive more material and worksheets please. While you may not speak during this time, you are free to give your partner non-verbal encouragement or empathy through body language, facial expressions, or meaningful looks. This book will walk the reader through a complete couples counseling treatment – from intake to termination. So nice to have free ways to get help and guidance through tough times. There are many resources out there that draw from theories or research in couples therapy. Do you know that I truly love you, and do I make it obvious? You are going to choose, prioritize, and elaborate on your top Relationship Values. Reply. i dont want a divorce and want to save my marriage and my challege is to any proffessional that can please help me save my marriage and give us advise of how to save our relatationship and keep our family together. , Marriage is not a guarantee that someone will stay with you forever they will eventually leave no matter what you both have shared together. It covers the most popular and most effective methods and approaches in couple therapy, including the history, theoretical foundations, research findings, and techniques for each. I found your work very helpful in Wirkung with my Clients. When a couple is having trouble, it can sometimes help to dig deeper into the good stuff rather than on the problems they are experiencing. It keeps the discussion light but reminds a couple of their special connection, while helping them learn more about themselves and their partner. I love him and want to help him and myself get thru this and move on to either repair our relationship so we can move forward or call it quits. Some may expect their spouse to take out the garbage and they, in turn, may expect you to have breakfast on the table every morning. Amanda. The four steps to effective apologizing are laid out as follows: This worksheet describes each step and provides tips for you or your client to follow the next time there is a disagreement, argument, or breach of trust. Isn’t that contrary to Baucom’s research findings on marital expectations? Naikan Reflection is a Japanese method of self-reflection that features in therapy as three questions (Krech, 2001); on this sheet there is space for you to record your answers. We are going trough hard times after only 3 months of relationship because we moved in together very quickly and that has put a lot of pressure on our relationship. The High-Conflict Couple draws from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) to provide exercises, techniques, and tools that will help a couple improve their communication, rediscover trust, and address their problems in a healthy and productive manner. Couples Counseling is an excellent resource for therapists, counselors, and other mental health professionals who work with couples. What are we doing to make sure that we are growing together, as opposed to growing apart. Very informative article. Healthy marriages require that each spouse’s expectations are clearly understood and reasonably fulfilled. The “Good Enough” Relationship. Tell me a wonderfully random childhood anecdote (Suval, 2015). Excellent article amidst changing relationship goals and family dynamics. The worksheet gives an extensive definition of codependency and mentions the relationships that are affected by codependency. We hope you found a few new ideas for how you can bond with your partner (or help your clients bond), but we also hope you got the underlying message—no relationship is perfect, but there are perfect ways of showing up for each other when it is hard. Find songs that resonate with your personal life story, showcase your personality, or articulate some of your most deeply held beliefs.