I don’t possess her shapely figure or her wit and cannot afford designer clothes. When my boyfriend and I are headed to work, I pick lint out of his beard while he lets me know about any nose danglers. Share this: Register. don't be so embarrassed, he's teasing you because of how you're reacting. Q. I am as secretive as I can be when I have to do my duty. Poop is not a stage you're going through, a bad habit that you'll never have to do again once you log enough hours with your therapist or trainer. But this sounds like a festival of passive-aggressiveness. By the time he comes back, he won't care that you're a stinky poop-girl. I jumped up, but it was too late. hi, i had the same problem too. Dinner went well, but when we returned to the room, my stomach started rumbling and there were farts — raunchy ones. Slate relies on advertising to support our journalism. lol PooPourri, I can just imagine these primed up preppy ass bitches spraying that stuff in the bathroom and pretending that they don't poop at all. It's natural if he has a problem with that then damn I'm not holding in any farts and suffering. Me and my girlfriend of 6 years are madly in love and have been living together for 4 years. I told her hastily, "See you later," headed directly for my shower, and never spoke to her again. Well, that wasn't the case: I spent the first two days locked in his bathroom, pooping my guts out. That's why I've developed some really good tricks to hide it. After pee there's like nothing more embarrassing. ?Just put some toilet paper inside the toilet :D life's hard huh? Thanks for your suggestions everyone. I bolted to the bathroom where I had explosive diarrhea. Well... you might get married one day, and then the jig is up! Everyone has to. Aha :) I guess it was bound to happen at some point but thankfully it was just in front of him. Faeces excrement is always stink I personally do not care to others who wanted to smell I do not care. Let me tell you first, that I grew up in a house where we did not speak of bathroom behavior. What would you do in my situation? You are a human being right? Let'r rip ladies! Not on a stupid website like this one. Don't twist things around and be more respectful ! If you find yourself in a position where you are with your boyfriend and can't hold it, this is what you do: open up your purse and give him all the money you have. Honnestly. Two of my boyfriends broke up with me over something like this. You could even do a google search and do this at home. He knows how uncomfortable I feel as it is. Poop at work, poop at home, poop in a box, poop with a fox, but, most importantly, poop when you have to poop at your significant other's house. Dear Prudence: Jealous of Boyfriend’s Dog. So either you invite her and enjoy the sparkle and liveliness she brings, or you leave her off the list and deal with the consequences. Now, I think you can just go with the flow, make joke with him about that or just dont say anything when he mentions that incident. All last night I couldn't even sleep because my stomach hurt so bad. What I concluded this week from studying 666 in the bible. So we started a routine where I'd tell him I needed to use the bathroom and ask for him to distract himself. Nothing about your digestive tract is a slippery slope into making relationship choices that you are uncomfortable with, okay? When girls make it a point not to fart cuz its "unlady like" thats when guys like to tease them a lot for it. Sure it sounds weird, but if you look up fetishes, if this is one of his, it will end up sounding pretty mild. All you filthy poop-girls make me nauseous just thinking about you. YOU CAN!IMPORTANT: If you want me to write you back I ONLY will if you send a self addressed envelope WITH A STAMP! Q. 0 0. you're boyfriend likes that if he does do you enjoy it, Don't apologize ahah :) I asked what your kinks were & you told me :), Has a girlfriend ever done that in front of you before? Every single problem I've ever had, I've googled first. What would you do in my situation? I yelled, as he was about to hit the door, still covering my mess with my own butt. But it is how you feel about yourself that is concerning me because you have been traumatized in such a way that it has effected your judgement. be glad he doesn't have a fetish with feces. Very true & he said it was hilarious and cute the way it happened LOL :P I'm comfortable around him but it's hard getting over embarrassing moments for me because I'm a perfectionist and a control freak aha. Go see a therapist and stop revealing your personal problems to a bunch of idiots. I just spent 6 days at my boyfriend's house and couldn't go. What can I do? 5 years ago. Gahh I'm still embarrassed but at least it gave us something to laugh about & he now he knows to stop when I tell him to lol :P. Haha it is a jerk move, unfortunately ;) . We hold major institutions accountable and expose wrongdoing. It might sound strange or weird to talk about this, but communication is really the only way for you to overcome this anxiety. You can raise a glass and say how she came to your emotional rescue, understood the pain of your childhood, and was instrumental in your healing. if you didn't care what he thought he wouldn't tease you. Go to a novelty store and buy a whoopee cushion, inflate it, and sneak it under him as he is preparing to sit down. But if you're just avoiding pooping due to some misguided ideas about how women are supposed to act, or what makes you sexy, I beg you to give the issue another consideration. A: You ask to talk to him in one of your offices if you have a door to shut, or find a place that does. This is not the place to come to for medical advice idiot. Nothing says true love like watching your boo shit in the sand. A: I suppose you could tell her that the party this year is going to be casual so you’d appreciate if she’d wear a Hefty bag. You say Erica declined the wedding via the RSVP card. Think of pooping with him nearby as a test of his merit. If you’re going to stay, every nursing woman knows how to accomplish this discreetly so that baby and breast are covered. THis is really affecting my life because I literally cannot use the bathroom at his home, or when he is around. My new boyfriend and I were on our way to introduce him to my parents, and my digestive system was acting up. None of this is my extended family’s fault, however. I understand that not everyone has the time or money to attend an out-of-town wedding, but I know Erica had the financial means. We’ve all heard it, we’ve all said it. That smell will be in my mind forever. yes yes i understand. I was in so much pain that I asked her to walk in front of me, because I was sure I was going to explode — and I did. aren't u living together? Just act normal. He talked to me less and less over the following weeks until he finally broke up with me over the phone. I actually don’t know if your sister is the life of the party and everyone leaves having been thoroughly entertained, or whether she’s an attention hog who take over the evening. They have this stuff called PooPourri. Lol :) Like I'm still blushing thinking about it, Yeah, he always jokes that he doesn't think girls fart of poop lol :) so far I haven't shown evidence to the contrary until now lol :P still so embarrassing. Lol, we don't care if you fart its not a turn off, its just funny teasing girls about stuff they get super embarrased about. He probably just thinks its cute. It is horrible for your body to hold in crap and bile like that and if you do hold it for that long you can also risk causing impacted bowels so GET THE HELL OVER IT. Why is pretending we don't such a thing? I don't think he would look at me any differently but who knows. In the beginning, I would ask him to do something on his own for a bit like go on the patio to smoke or read a book or watch tv while i would run the shower and use the toilet. say your going for a shower and turn the water on, then shit and get in the shower after ur done. Later that day, we were greeted by his dog, who had a white string hanging out of his mouth. The best thing to do is to just talk to your boyfriend about it. Something is wrong with him. Behind this gas station, in freezing weather, I stripped down to my bare poopy ass and wiped as much as I could. He was all "Was that a fart, Kristen? In college, I invited a girl over for stir-fry at my house and then we went for a walk on the beach. A guy invited me over after dinner to watch a movie. You know what I'd do? You get to make your own choices about what constitutes intimacy at every level of your relationship, and no one can make those "peeing in front of each other"-type decisions except you. And you'll never see this message again. Lol, Yeah I've read your description.You wanted to get over the embarrassment quickly, so that's what I suggest.Your boyfriend seems nice tho kinda a little immature xD, Yep that's him alright lol :) let's say I'm the mature one in our relationship ahha :P, Telling his friends was such a jerk move lol :) He knows I try really hard to be a lady! With the water on, then hop in the shower afterwards. I highly doubt he's unattracted to you now, he sounds like a fun lighthearted kind of guy. Like TheJackel said, it's all in your head. I started freaking out, and for some reason I ended up in his kitchen, found a plastic knife, went back in the bathroom, cut the poop in half, and flushed again. My poop was the consistency of soft-serve ice cream, swirling around the toilet bowl with corn pieces in it. Lol :) it was just so unexpected and I was trying to avoid doing that in front of him but it just sort of happened! You spray it in the bowl before you go and no one can smell it. This Site Might Help You. Two of my boyfriends broke up with me over something like this. I'm sure he'll be more than perfectly fine with it. She hit the brakes and I jumped out, praying the bathroom would at least be open. it’s like weird? My guy friends and all the dudes I have known in my life, don't give a damn if you're pooping or not. If you value our work, please disable your ad blocker. Around 10 months ago we moved in together. Try lowering the larger turds by hand!! Guys joke about the poop fairy and how girls don't do that because you'll always be our perfect angelic ladies in our eyes and we don't want to think about you doing that stuff but deep down, we know that you do. I was so embarrassed that I started crying, and my boyfriend had to call my mom to bring clean clothes. I thought that would make me feel better, but nope — vomit started coming out! You can cancel anytime. Did you tell him though that you thought it was? Tipping: My girlfriend and I have an argument going and are looking to you to help us.Whenever we go out to eat, I pay for the meal and tip on my credit card.